555

581

582

     What was thaas? Fog was whaas? Too mult sleepth. Let

sleepth.

    But really now whenabouts? Expatiate then how much times

we live in. Yes?

    So, nat by night by naught by naket, in those good old lousy

days gone by, the days, shall we say? of Whom shall we say?

while kinderwardens minded their twinsbed, therenow they-

stood, the sycomores, all four of them, in their quartan agues, the

majorchy, the minorchy, the everso and the fermentarian with

their ballyhooric blowreaper, titranicht by tetranoxst, at their

pussycorners, and that old time pallyollogass, playing copers fear-

some, with Gus Walker, the cuddy, and his poor old dying

boosy cough, esker, newcsle, saggard, crumlin, dell me, donk,

the way to wumblin. Follow me beeline and you're bumblin,

esker, newcsle, saggard, crumlin. And listening. So gladdied up

when nicechild Kevin Mary (who was going to be comman-

deering chief of the choirboys' brigade the moment he grew up

under all the auspices) irishsmiled in his milky way of cream

dwibble and onage tustard and dessed tabbage, frighted out when

badbrat Jerry Godolphing (who was hurrying to be cardinal

scullion in a night refuge as bald as he was cured enough

unerr all the hospitals) furrinfrowned down his wrinkly waste

of methylated spirits, ick, and lemoncholy lees, ick, and pulverised

rhubarbarorum, icky;

 

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556

 

night by silentsailing night while infantina Isobel (who will be
blushing all day to be, when she growed up one Sunday,

Saint Holy and Saint Ivory, when she took the veil, the

beautiful presentation nun, so barely twenty, in her pure coif,

sister Isobel, and next Sunday, Mistlemas, when she looked

a peach, the beautiful Samaritan, still as beautiful and still

in her teens, nurse Saintette Isabelle, with stiffstarched cuffs but

on Holiday, Christmas, Easter mornings when she wore a wreath,

the wonderful widow of eighteen springs, Madame Isa Veuve La

Belle, so sad but lucksome in her boyblue's long black with

orange blossoming weeper's veil) for she was the only girl they

loved, as she is the queenly pearl you prize, because of the way

the night that first we met she is bound to be, methinks, and not

in vain, the darling of my heart, sleeping in her april cot, within

her singachamer, with her greengageflavoured candywhistle

duetted to the crazyquilt, Isobel, she is so pretty, truth to tell,

wildwood's eyes and primarose hair, quietly, all the woods so

wild, in mauves of moss and daphnedews, how all so still she lay,

neath of the whitethorn, child of tree, like some losthappy leaf,

like blowing flower stilled, as fain would she anon, for soon again

'twill be, win me, woo me, wed me, ah weary me! deeply, now

evencalm lay sleeping;

    nowth upon nacht, while in his tumbril Wachtman Havelook

seequeerscenes, from yonsides of the choppy, punkt by his

curserbog, went long the grassgross bumpinstrass that henders

the pubbel to pass, stowing his bottle in a hole for at whet his

whuskle to stretch ecrooksman, sequestering for lovers' lost pro-

pertied offices the leavethings from allpurgers' night, og gneiss

ogas gnasty, kikkers, brillers, knappers and bands, handsboon

and strumpers, sminkysticks and eddiketsflaskers;

    wan fine night and the next fine night and last find night while

Kothereen the Slop in her native's chambercushy, with dreamings

of simmering my veal astore, was basquing to her pillasleep how

she thawght a knogg came to the dowanstairs dour at that howr

to peirce the yare and dowandshe went, schritt be schratt, to see

was it Schweeps's mingerals or Shuhorn the posth with a tilly-

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557

cramp for Hemself and Co, Esquara, or them four hoarsemen on

their apolkaloops, Norreys, Soothbys, Yates and Welks, and,

galorybit of the sanes in hevel, there was a crick up the stirkiss

and when she ruz the cankle to see, galohery, downand she went

on her knees to blessersef that were knogging together like milk-

juggles as if it was the wrake of the hapspurus or old Kong

Gander O'Toole of the Mountains or his googoo goosth she

seein, sliving off over the sawdust lobby out of the backroom, wan

ter, that was everywans in turruns, in his honeymoon trim, holding

up his fingerhals, with the clookey in his fisstball, tocher of davy's,

tocher of ivileagh, for her to whisht, you sowbelly, and the

whites of his pious eyebulbs swering her to silence and coort;

    each and every juridical sessions night, whenas goodmen

twelve and true at fox and geese in their numbered habitations

tried old wireless over boord in their juremembers, whereas by

reverendum they found him guilty of their and those imputations

of fornicolopulation with two of his albowcrural correlations on

whom he was said to have enjoyed by anticipation when school-

ing them in amown, mid grass, she sat, when man was, amazingly

frank, for their first conjugation whose colours at standing up

from the above were of a pretty carnation but, if really 'twere

not so, of some deretane denudation with intent to excitation,

caused by his retrogradation, among firearmed forces proper to

this nation but apart from all titillation which, he said, was under

heat pressure and a good mitigation without which in any case

he insists upon being worthy of continued alimentation for him

having displayed, he says, such grand toleration, reprobate so

noted and all, as he was, with his washleather sweeds and his

smokingstump, for denying transubstantiation nevertheless in

respect of his highpowered station, whereof more especially as

probably he was meantime suffering genteel tortures from the

best medical attestation, as he oftentimes did, having only

strength enough, by way of festination, to implore (or I believe

you have might have said better) to complore, with complete

obsecration, on everybody connected with him the curse of co-

agulation for, he tells me outside Sammon's in King Street, after

 

558

two or three hours of close confabulation, by this pewterpint of

Gilbey's goatswhey which is his prime consolation, albeit in-

volving upon the same no uncertain amount of esophagous re-

gurgitation, he being personally unpreoccupied to the extent of

a flea's gizzard anent eructation, if he was still extremely offen-

sive to a score and four nostrils' dilatation, still he was likewise,

on the other side of him, for some nepmen's eyes a delectation, as

he asserts without the least alienation, so prays of his faullt you

would make obliteration but for our friend behind the bars,

though like Adam Findlater, a man of estimation, summing him

up to be done, be what will of excess his exaltation, still we think

with Sully there can be no right extinuation for contravention

of common and statute legislation for which the fit remedy

resides, for Mr Sully, in corporal amputation: so three months for

Gubbs Jeroboam, the frothwhiskered pest of the park, as per

act one, section two, schedule three, clause four of the fifth of

King Jark, this sentence to be carried out tomorrowmorn by

Nolans Volans at six o'clock shark, and may the yeastwind and

the hoppinghail malt mercy on his seven honeymeads and his

hurlyburlygrowth, Amen, says the Clarke;

    niece by nice by neat by natty, whilst amongst revery's happy

gardens nine with twenty Leixlip yearlings, darters all, had such a

ripping time with gleeful cries of what is nice toppingshaun made

of made for and weeping like fun, him to be gone, for they were

never happier, huhu, than when they were miserable, haha;

    in their bed of trial, on the bolster of hardship, by the glimmer

of memory, under coverlets of cowardice, Albatrus Nyanzer with

Victa Nyanza, his mace of might mortified, her beautifell hung

up on a nail, he, Mr of our fathers, she, our moddereen ru arue

rue, they, ay, by the hodypoker and blazier, they are, as sure as

dinny drops into the dyke . . .

    A cry off.

    Where are we at all? and whenabouts in the name of space?

    I don't understand. I fail to say. I dearsee you too.

    House of the cederbalm of mead. Garth of Fyon. Scene and

property plot. Stagemanager's prompt. Interior of dwelling on out-

 

559

 

skirts of city. Groove two. Chamber scene. Boxed. Ordinary bed-

room set. Salmonpapered walls. Back, empty Irish grate, Adam's

mantel, with wilting elopement fan, soot and tinsel, condemned.

North, wall with window practicable. Argentine in casement.

Vamp. Pelmit above. No curtains. Blind drawn. South, party wall.

Bed for two with strawberry bedspread, wickerworker clubsessel

and caneseated millikinstool. Bookshrine without, facetowel upon.

Chair for one. Woman's garments on chair. Man's trousers with

crossbelt braces, collar on bedknob. Man's corduroy surcoat with

tabrets and taces, seapan nacre buttons on nail. Woman's gown

on ditto. Over mantelpiece picture of Michael, lance, slaying

Satan, dragon with smoke. Small table near bed, front. Bed with

bedding. Spare. Flagpatch quilt. Yverdown design. Limes.

Lighted lamp without globe, scarf, gazette, tumbler, quantity

of water, julepot, ticker, side props, eventuals, man's gummy

article, pink.

    A time.

    Act: dumbshow.

    Closeup. Leads.

    Man with nightcap, in bed, fore. Woman, with curlpins, hind.

Discovered. Side point of view. First position of harmony. Say!

Eh? Ha! Check action. Matt. Male partly masking female. Man

looking round, beastly expression, fishy eyes, paralleliped

homoplatts, ghazometron pondus, exhibits rage. Business. Ruddy

blond, Armenian bole, black patch, beer wig, gross build,

episcopalian, any age. Woman, sitting, looks at ceiling, haggish

expression, peaky nose, trekant mouth, fithery wight, exhibits

fear. Welshrabbit teint, Nubian shine, nasal fossette, turfy tuft,

undersized, free kirk, no age. Closeup. Play!

    Callboy.   Cry off. Tabler. Her move.

    Footage.

    By the sinewy forequarters of the mare Pocahontas and by the

white shoulders of Finnuala you should have seen how that

smart sallowlass just hopped a nanny's gambit out of bunk like

old mother Mesopotomac and in eight and eight sixtyfour she

was off, door, knightlamp with her, billy's largelimbs prodgering

 

560

 

after to queen's lead. Promiscuous Omebound to Fiammelle la

Diva. Huff! His move. Blackout.

    Circus. Corridor.

    Shifting scene. Wall flats: sink and fly. Spotlight working wall

cloths. Spill playing rake and bridges. Room to sink: stairs to

sink behind room. Two pieces. Haying after queue. Replay.

    The old humburgh looks a thing incomplete so. It is so. On its

dead. But it will pawn up a fine head of porter when it is finished.

In the quicktime. The castle arkwright put in a chequered staircase

certainly. It has only one square step, to be steady, yet notwith-

stumbling are they stalemating backgammoner supstairs by skips

and trestles tiltop double corner. Whist while and game.

    What scenic artist! It is ideal residence for realtar. By hims

ingang tilt tinkt a tunning bell that Limen Mr, that Boggey

Godde, be airwaked. Lingling, lingling. Be their maggies in all.

Chump, do your ephort. Shop! Please shop! Shop ado please!

O ado please shop! How hominous his house, haunt it? Yesses

indead it be! Nogen, of imperial measure, is begraved beneadher.

Here are his naggins poured, his alladim lamps. Around the

bloombiered, booty with the bedst. For them whom he have

fordone make we newly thankful !

    Tell me something. The Porters, so to speak, after their

shadowstealers in the newsbaggers, are very nice people, are they

not? Very, all fourlike tellt. And on this wise, Mr Porter (Bar-

tholomew, heavy man, astern, mackerel shirt, hayamatt peruke)

is an excellent forefather and Mrs Porter (leading lady, a

poopahead, gaffneysaffron nightdress, iszoppy chepelure) is a

most kindhearted messmother. A so united family pateramater

is not more existing on papel or off of it. As keymaster fits the

lock it weds so this bally builder to his streamline secret. They

care for nothing except everything that is allporterous. Porto

da Brozzo! Isn't that terribly nice of them? You can ken that they

come of a rarely old family by their costumance and one must

togive that one supped of it in all tonearts from awe to zest. I

think I begin to divine so much. Only snakkest me truesome! I

stone us I'm hable.

 

 

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561

To reachy a skeer do! Still hoyhra, till venstra! Here are two

rooms on the upstairs, at forkflank and at knifekanter. Whom in

the wood are they for? Why, for little Porter babes, to be saved!

The coeds, boytom thwackers and timbuy teaser. Here is one-

thing you owed two noe. This one once upon awhile was the

other but this is the other one nighadays. Ah so? The Corsicos?

They are numerable. Guest them. Major bed, minor bickhive.

Halosobuth, sov us! Who sleeps in now number one, for ex-

ample? A pussy, purr esimple. Cunina, Statulina and Edulia,

but how sweet of her! Has your pussy a pessname? Yes, indeed,

you will hear it passim in all the noveletta and she is named

Buttercup. Her bare name will tellt it, a monitress. How very

sweet of her and what an excessively lovecharming missyname

to forsake, now that I come to drink of it filtred, a gracecup

fulled of bitterness. She is dadad's lottiest daughterpearl and

brooder's cissiest auntybride. Her shellback thimblecasket mirror

only can show her dearest friendeen. To speak well her grace

it would ask of Grecian language, of her goodness, that legend

golden. Biryina Saindua! Loreas with lillias flocaflake arrosas!

Here's newyearspray, the posquiflor, a windaborne and helio-

trope; there miriamsweet and amaranth and marygold to crown.

Add lightest knot unto tiptition. O Charis! O Charissima!

A more intriguant bambolina could one not colour up out

of Boccuccia's Enameron. Would one but to do apart a lilybit her

virginelles and, so, to breath, so, therebetween, behold, she had

instantt with her handmade as to graps the myth inmid the air.

Mother of moth! I will to show herword in flesh. Approach not for

ghost sake! It is dormition! She may think, what though little doth

she realise, as morning fresheth, it hath happened her, you know

what, as they too what two dare not utter. Silvoo plush, if scolded

she draws a face. Petticoat's asleep but in the gentlenest of her

thoughts apoo is a nursepin. To be presented, Babs for Bim-

bushi? Of courts and with enticers. Up, girls, and at him! Alone?

Alone what? I mean, our strifestirrer, does she do fleurty winkies

with herself. Pussy is never alone, as records her chambrette, for

she can always look at Biddles and talk petnames with her little

 

 

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562

 

playfilly when she is sitting downy on the ploshmat. O, she

talks, does she? Marry, how? Rosepetalletted sounds. Ah Biddles

es ma plikplak. Ah plikplak wed ma Biddles. A nice jezebel bary-

tinette she will gift but I much prefer her missnomer in maidenly

golden lasslike gladsome wenchful flowery girlish beautycapes.

So do I, much. Dulce delicatissima! Doth Dolly weeps she is

hastings. Will Dally bumpsetty it is tubtime. Allaliefest, she who

pities very pebbles, dare we not wish on her our thrice onsk?

A lovely fear! That she seventip toe her chrysming, that she spin

blue to scarlad till her temple's veil, that the Mount of Whoam it

open it her to shelterer! She will blow ever so much more pro-

misefuller, blee me, than all the other common marygales that

romp round brigidschool, charming Carry Whambers or saucy

Susy Maucepan of Merry Anna Patchbox or silly Polly Flinders.

Platsch! A plikaplak.

    And since we are talking amnessly of brukasloop crazedledaze,

who doez in sleeproom number twobis? The twobirds. Holy

policeman, O, I see! Of what age are your birdies? They are to

come of twinning age so soon as they may be born to be elder-

ing like those olders while they are living under chairs. They are

and they seem to be so tightly tattached as two maggots to touch

other, I think I notice, do I not? You do. Our bright bull babe

Frank Kevin is on heartsleeveside. Do not you waken him ! Our

farheard bode. He is happily to sleep, limb of the Lord, with his

lifted in blessing, his buchel Iosa, like the blissed angel he looks so

like and his mou is semiope as though he were blowdelling on a

bugigle. Whene'er I see those smiles in eyes 'tis Father Quinn

again. Very shortly he will smell sweetly when he will hear a weird

to wean. By gorgeous, that boy will blare some knight when he will

take his dane's pledges and quit our ingletears, spite of undesirable

parents, to wend him to Amorica to quest a cashy job. That keen

dean with his veen nonsolance! O, I adore the profeen music!

Dollarmighty! He is too audorable really, eunique! I guess to

have seen somekid like him in the story book, guess I met some-

where somelam to whom he will be becoming liker. But hush!

How unpardonable of me! I beg for your venials, sincerely I do.

 

 

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563

 

    Hush! The other, twined on codliverside, has been crying in

his sleep, making sharpshape his inscissors on some first choice

sweets fished out of the muck. A stake in our mead. What a

teething wretch! How his book of craven images! Here are post-

humious tears on his intimelle. And he has pipettishly bespilled

himself from his foundingpen as illspent from inkinghorn. He is

jem job joy pip poo pat (jot um for a sobrat!) Jerry Jehu. You will

know him by name in the capers but you cannot see whose heel he

sheepfolds in his wrought hand because I have not told it to you.

O, foetal sleep! Ah, fatal slip! the one loved, the other left, the

bride of pride leased to the stranger! He will be quite within the pale

when with lordbeeron brow he vows him so tosset to be of the sir

Blake tribes bleak while through life's unblest he rodes backs of

bannars. Are you not somewhat bulgar with your bowels?

Whatever do you mean with bleak? With pale blake I write tint-

ingface. O, you do? And with steelwhite and blackmail I ha'scint

for my sweet an anemone's letter with a gold of my bridest hair

betied. Donatus his mark, address as follows. So you did? From

the Cat and Cage. O, I see and see! In the ink of his sweat

he will find it yet. What Gipsy Devereux vowed to Lylian and

why the elm and how the stone. You never may know in the

preterite all perhaps that you would not believe that you ever

even saw to be about to. Perhaps. But they are two very blizky

little portereens after their bredscrums, Jerkoff and Eatsup, as

for my part opinion indeed. They would be born so, costarred,

puck and prig, the maryboy at Donnybrook Fair, the godolphing-

lad in the Hoy's Court. How frilled one shall be as at taledold of

Formio and Cigalette ! What folly innocents ! Theirs whet pep of

puppyhood! Both barmhearts shall become yeastcake by their

brackfest. I will to leave a my copperwise blessing between the

pair of them, for rosengorge, for greenafang. Blech and tin soldies,

weals in a sniffbox. Som's wholed, all's parted. Weeping shouldst

not thou be when man falls but that divine scheming ever adoring

be. So you be either man or mouse and you be neither fish nor

flesh. Take. And take. Vellicate nyche! Be ones as wes for gives for

gives now the hour of passings sembles quick with quelled. Adieu,

soft adieu, for these nice presents, kerryjevin. Still tosorrow!

 

 

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564

 

    Jeminy, what is the view which now takes up a second posi-

tion of discordance, tell it please? Mark! You notice it in that

rereway because the male entail partially eclipses the femecovert.

It is so called for its discord the meseedo. Do you ever heard the

story about Helius Croesus, that white and gold elephant in our

zoopark? You astonish me by it. Is it not that we are command-

ing from fullback, woman permitting, a profusely fine birdseye

view from beauhind this park? Finn his park has been much the

admiration of all the stranger ones, grekish and romanos, who

arrive to here. The straight road down the centre (see relief map)

bisexes the park which is said to be the largest of his kind in the

world. On the right prominence confronts you the handsome

vinesregent's lodge while, turning to the other supreme piece of

cheeks, exactly opposite, you are confounded by the equally hand-

some chief sacristary's residence. Around is a little amiably tufted

and man is cheered when he bewonders through the boskage

how the nature in all frisko is enlivened by gentlemen's seats.

Here are heavysuppers —  'tis for daddies housings for hun-

dredaires of our super thin thousand. By gum, but you have

resin! Of these tallworts are yielded out juices for jointoils and

pappasses for paynims. Listeneth! 'Tis a tree story. How olave,

that firile, was aplantad in her liveside. How tannoboom held

tonobloom. How rood in norlandes. The black and blue marks

athwart the weald, which now barely is so stripped, indicate the

presence of sylvious beltings. Therewithal shady rides lend

themselves out to rustic cavalries. In yonder valley, too,

stays mountain sprite. Any pretty dears are to be caught inside

but it is a bad pities of the plain. A scarlet pimparnell now

mules the mound where anciently first murders were wanted

to take root. By feud fionghalian. Talkingtree and sinningstone

stay on either hand. Hystorical leavesdroppings may also be gar-

nered up with sir Shamus Swiftpatrick, Archfieldchaplain of Saint

Lucan's. How familiar it is to see all these interesting advenements

with one snaked's eyes! Is all? Yet not. Hear one's. At the bodom

fundus of this royal park, which, with tvigate shyasian gardeenen,

is open to the public till night at late, so well the sissastrides so will

 

 

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565

 

the pederestians, do not fail to point to yourself a depression

called Holl Hollow. It is often quite guttergloomering in our

duol and gives wankyrious thoughts to the head but the banders

of the pentapolitan poleetsfurcers bassoons into it on windy

woodensdays their wellbooming wolvertones. Ulvos! Ulvos!

    Whervolk dorst ttou begin to tremble by our moving pictures

at this moment when I am to place my hand of our true friend-

shapes upon thee knee to mark well what I say? Throu shayest

who? In Amsterdam there lived a . . . But how? You are trem-

blotting, you retchad, like a verry jerry! Niet? Will you a gui-

neeser? Gaij beutel of staub? To feel, you? Yes, how it trembles,

the timid! Vortigern, ah Gortigern! Overlord of Mercia! Or

doth brainskin flinchgreef? Stemming! What boyazhness! Sole

shadow shows. Tis jest jibberweek's joke. It must have stole. O,

keve silence, both! Putshameyu! I have heard her voice some-

where else's before me in these ears still that now are for mine.

    Let op. Slew musies. Thunner in the eire.

    You were dreamend, dear. The pawdrag? The fawthrig?

Shoe! Hear are no phanthares in the room at all, avikkeen. No

bad bold faathern, dear one. Opop opop capallo, muy malinchily

malchick! Gothgorod father godown followay tomollow the

lucky load to Lublin for make his thoroughbass grossman's big-

ness. Take that two piece big slap slap bold honty bottomsside

pap pap pappa.

    —  Li ne dormis?

    —  S! Malbone dormas.

    —  Kia li krias nikte?

    —  Parolas infanetes. S!

    Sonly all in your imagination, dim. Poor little brittle magic

nation, dim of mind! Shoe to me now, dear! Shoom of me! While

elvery stream winds seling on for to keep this barrel of bounty

rolling and the nightmail afarfrom morning nears.

    When you're coaching through Lucalised, on the sulphur spa

to visit, it's safer to hit than miss it, stop at his inn! The hammers

are telling the cobbles, the pickts are hacking the saxums, it's

snugger to burrow abed than ballet on broadway. Tuck in your

 

 

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566

 

blank! For it's race pound race the hosties rear all roads to ruin

and layers by lifetimes laid down riches from poormen. Cried

unions to chip, saltpetre to strew, gallpitch to drink, stonebread

to break but it's bully to gulp good blueberry pudding. Doze

in your warmth ! While the elves in the moonbeams, feeling why,

will keep my lilygem gently gleaming.

    In the sleepingchambers. The court to go into half morning.

The four seneschals with their palfrey to be there now, all

balaaming in their sellaboutes and sharping up their penisills. The

boufeither Soakersoon at holdup tent sticker. The swabsister

Katya to have duntalking and to keep shakenin dowan her drogh-

edars. Those twelve chief barons to stand by duedesmally with

their folded arums and put down all excursions and false alarums

and after that to go back now to their runameat farums and re-

compile their magnum chartarums with the width of the road

between them and all harrums. The maidbrides all, in favours

gay, to strew sleety cinders on their falling hair and for wouldbe

joybells to ring sadly ringless hands. The dame dowager to stay

kneeled how she is, as first mutherer with cord in coil. The two

princes of the tower royal, daulphin and deevlin, to lie how they

are without to see. The dame dowager's duffgerent to present

wappon, blade drawn to the full and about wheel without to be

seen of them. The infant Isabella from her coign to do obeisance

toward the duffgerent, as first futherer with drawn brand. Then

the court to come in to full morning. Herein see ye fail not!

    —  Vidu, porkego! Ili vi rigardas. Returnu, porkego. Maldeli-

kato!

    Gauze off heaven! Vision. Then. O, pluxty suddly, the sight

entrancing! Hummels! That crag! Those hullocks! O Sire! So be

accident occur is not going to commence! What have you there-

fore? Fear you the donkers? Of roovers? I fear lest we have lost

ours (non grant it!) respecting these wildy parts. How is hit finis-

ter! How shagsome all and beastful! What do you show on? I

show because I must see before my misfortune so a stark pointing

pole. Lord of ladders, what for lungitube! Can you read the verst

legend hereon? I am hather of the missed. Areed! To the dun-

 

 

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567

 

leary obelisk via the rock vhat myles knox furlongs; to the

general's postoffice howsands of patience; to the Wellington

memorial half a league wrongwards; to Sara's bridge good hun-

ter and nine to meet her: to the point, one yeoman's yard. He, he,

he! At that do you leer, a setting up? With a such unfettered belly?

Two cascades? I leer (O my big, O my bog, O my bigbagbone!)

because I must see a buntingcap of so a pinky on the point. It is

for a true glover's greetings and many burgesses by us, greats

and grosses, uses to pink it in this way at tet-at-tet. For long has

it been effigy of standard royal when broken on roofstaff which

to the gunnings shall cast welcome from Courtmilits' Fortress,

umptydum dumptydum. Bemark you these hangovers, those

streamer fields, his influx. Do you not have heard that, the queen

lying abroad from fury of the gales, (meekname mocktitles her

Nan Nan Nanetta) her liege of lateenth dignisties shall come on

their bay tomorrow, Michalsmas, mellems the third and fourth of

the clock, there to all the king's aussies and all their king's men,

knechts tramplers and cavalcaders, led of herald graycloak, Ulaf

Goldarskield? Dog! Dog! Her lofts will be loosed for her and

their tumblers broodcast. A progress shall be made in walk, ney? I

trow it well, and uge by uge. He shall come, sidesmen accostant, by

aryan jubilarian and on brigadier-general Nolan or and buccaneer-

admiral Browne, with —  who can doubt it? —  his golden beagles

and his white elkox terriers for a hunting on our littlego illcome

faxes. In blue and buff of Beaufort the hunt shall make. It is

poblesse noblige. Ommes will grin through collars when each

riders other's ass. Me Eccls! What cats' killings overall! What

popping out of guillotened widows! Quick time! Beware of

waiting! Squintina plies favours on us from her rushfrail and

Zosimus, the crowder, in his surcoat, sues us with souftwister.

Apart we! Here are gantlets. I believe, by Plentifolks Mixymost!

Yet if I durst to express the hope how I might be able to be pre-

sent. All these peeplers entrammed and detrained on bikeygels

and troykakyls and those puny farting little solitires! Tollacre,

tollacre! Polo north will beseem Sibernian and Plein Pelouta will

behowl ne yerking at lawncastrum ne ghimbelling on guelflinks.

 

 

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568

 

Mauser Misma shall cease to stretch her and come abroad for what

the blinkins is to be seen. A ruber, a rancher, a fullvide, a veri-

dust and as crerdulous behind as he was before behind a damson

of a sloe cooch. Mbv! The annamation of evabusies, the livlia-

ness of her laughings, such as a plurity of bells! Have peacience,

pray you! Place to dames! Even the Lady Victoria Landauner

will leave to loll and parasol, all giddied into gushgasps with her

dickey standing. Britus and Gothius shall no more joustle for

that sonneplace but mark one autonement when, with si so silent,

Cloudia Aiduolcis, good and dewed up, shall let fall, yes, no, yet,

now, a rain. Muchsias grapcias! It is how sweet from her, the

wispful, and they are soon seen swopsib so a sautril as a meise.

Its ist not the tear on this movent sped. Tix sixponce! Poum!

Hool poll the bull? Fool pay the bill. Becups a can full. Peal, pull

the bell ! Still sayeme of ceremonies, much much more! So please-

your! It stands in Instopressible how Meynhir Mayour, our

boorgomaister, thon staunch Thorsman, (our Nancy's fancy, our

own Nanny's Big Billy), his hod hoisted, in best bib and tucker,

with Woolington bottes over buckram babbishkis and his clouded

cane and necknoose aureal, surrounded of his full cooperation

with fixed baronets and meng our pueblos, restrained by chain of

hands from pinchgut, hoghill, darklane, gibbetmeade and beaux

and laddes and bumbellye, shall receive Dom King at broadstone

barrow meet a keys of goodmorrow on to his pompey cushion.

Me amble dooty to your grace's majers! Arise, sir Pompkey

Dompkey! Ear! Ear! Weakear! An allness eversides! We but

miss that horse elder yet cherchant of the wise graveleek in

cabbuchin garden. That his be foison, old Caubeenhauben!

'Twill be tropic of all days. By the splendour of Sole! Perfect

weatherest prevailing. Thisafter, swift's mightmace deposing, he

shall aidress to His Serenemost by a speechreading from his

miniated vellum, alfi byrni gamman dealter etcera zezera eacla

treacla youghta kaptor lomdom noo, who meaningwhile that

illuminatured one, Papyroy of Pepinregn, my Sire, great, big King,

(his scaffold is there set up, as to edify, by Rex Ingram, pageant-

master) will be poking out with his canule into the arras of

 

 

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569

 

what brilliant bridgecloths and joking up with his tonguespitz

to the crimosing balkonladies, here's a help undo their modest

stays with a fullbelow may the funnyfeelbelong. Oddsbones,

that may it! Carilloners will ring their gluckspeels. Rng rng!

Rng rng! S. Presbutt-in-the-North, S. Mark Underloop,

S. Lorenz-by-the-Toolechest, S. Nicholas Myre. You shall

hark to anune S. Gardener, S. George-le-Greek, S. Barclay

Moitered, S. Phibb, Iona-in-the-Fields with Paull-the-Aposteln.

And audialterand: S. Jude-at-Gate, Bruno Friars, S. Weslen-

on-the-Row, S. Molyneux Without, S. Mary Stillamaries with

Bride-and-Audeons-behind-Wardborg. How chimant in effect!

Alla tingaling pealabells! So a many of churches one cannot

pray own's prayers. 'Tis holyyear's day! Juin jully we may!

Agithetta and Tranquilla shall demure umclaused but Marl-

borough-the-Less, Greatchrist and Holy Protector shall have

open virgilances. Beata Basilica! But will be not pontifi-

cation? Dock, dock, agame! Primatially. At wateredge. Can-

taberra and Neweryork may supprecate when, by vepers, for

towned and travalled, his goldwhite swaystick aloft ylifted,

umbrilla-parasoul, Monsigneur of Deublan shall impart to all.

Benedictus benedicat! To board! And mealsight! Unjoint him

this bittern, frust me this chicken, display yon crane, thigh her

her pigeon, unlace allay rabbit and pheasant! Sing: Old Finncoole,

he's a mellow old saoul when he swills with his fuddlers free!

Poppop array! For we're all jollygame fellhellows which no-

bottle can deny! Here be trouts culponed for ye and salmons

chined and sturgeons tranched, sanced capons, lobsters barbed.

Call halton eatwords! Mumm me moe mummers! What, no

Ithalians? How, not one Moll Pamelas? Accordingly! Play actors

by us ever have crash to their gate. Mr Messop and Mr Borry will

produce of themselves, as they're two genitalmen of Veruno,

Senior Nowno and Senior Brolano (finaly! finaly!), all for love of

a fair penitent that, a she be broughton, rhoda's a rosy she. Their

two big skins! How they strave to gat her! Such a boyplay! Their

bouchicaulture! What tyronte power! Buy our fays! My name is

novel and on the Granby in hills. Bravose! Thou traitor slave!

 

 

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570

 

Mine name's Apnorval and o'er the Grandbeyond Mountains.

Bravossimost! The royal nusick their show shall shut with song-

slide to nature's solemn silence. Deep Dalchi Dolando! Might

gentle harp addurge! It will give piketurns on the tummlipplads

and forain dances and crosshurdles and dollmanovers and viceuv-

ious pyrolyphics, a snow of dawnflakes, at darkfall for Grace's

Mamnesty and our fancy ladies, all assombred. Some wholetime in

hot town tonight! You do not have heard? It stays in book

of that which is. I have heard anyone tell it jesterday (master

currier with brassard was't) how one should come on morrow

here but it is never here that one today. Well but remind to think,

you where yestoday Ys Morganas war and that it is always to-

morrow in toth's tother's place. Amen.

    True! True! Vouchsafe me more soundpicture! It gives furi-

ously to think. Is rich Mr Pornter, a squire, not always in his such

strong health? I thank you for the best, he is in taken deal ex-

ceedingly herculeneous. One sees how he is lot stoutlier than of

formerly. One would say him to hold whole a litteringture of

kidlings under his aproham. Has handsome Sir Pournter always

been so long married? O yes, Lord Pournterfamilias has been

marryingman ever since so long time in Hurtleforth, where he

appeers as our oily the active, and, yes indeed, he has his mic son

and his two fine mac sons and a superfine mick want they mack

metween them. She, she, she! But on what do you again leer? I am

not leering, I pink you pardons. I am highly sheshe sherious.

    Do you not must want to go somewhere on the present?

Yes, O pity! At earliest moment! That prickly heat feeling! For-

think not me spill it's at always so guey. Here we shall do a

far walk (O pity) anygo khaibits till the number one of sairey's

place. Is, is. I want you to admire her sceneries illustrationing

our national first rout, one ought ought one. We shall too

downlook on that ford where Sylvanus Sanctus washed but

hurdley those tips of his anointeds. Do not show ever retrorsehim,

crockodeyled, till that you become quite crimstone in the face!

Beware! guardafew! It is Stealer of the Heart! I am anxious in

regard you should everthrown your sillarsalt. I will dui sui, tef-

 

 

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571

 

nute! These brilling waveleaplights! Please say me how sing you

them. Seekhem seckhem! They arise from a clear springwell in

the near of our park which makes the daft to hear all blend. This

place of endearment! How it is clear! And how they cast their

spells upon, the fronds that thereup float, the bookstaff branch-

ings! The druggeted stems, the leaves incut on trees! Do you

can their tantrist spellings? I can lese, skillmistress aiding. Elm,

bay, this way, cull dare, take a message, tawny runes ilex sallow,

meet me at the pine. Yes, they shall have brought us to the water

trysting, by hedjes of maiden ferm, then here in another place is

their chapelofeases, sold for song, of which you have thought

my praise too much my price. O ma ma! Yes, sad one of Ziod?

Sell me, my soul dear! Ah, my sorrowful, his cloister dreeping

of his monkshood, how it is triste to death, all his dark ivytod!

Where cold in dearth. Yet see, my blanching kissabelle, in the

under close she is allso gay, her kirtles green, her curtsies white,

her peony pears, her nistlingsloes! I, pipette, I must also quick-

lingly to tryst myself softly into this littleeasechapel. I would

rather than Ireland! But I pray, make! Do your easiness! O,

peace, this is heaven! O, Mr Prince of Pouringtoher, whatever

shall I pppease to do? Why do you so lifesighs, my precious, as

I hear from you, with limmenings lemantitions, after that swollen

one? I am not sighing, I assure, but only I am soso sorry about

all in my saarasplace. Listen, listen! I am doing it. Hear more to

those voices! Always I am hearing them. Horsehem coughs

enough. Annshee lispes privily.

    —  He is quieter now.

    —  Legalentitled. Accesstopartnuzz. Notwildebeestsch. By-

rightofoaptz. Twainbeonerflsh. Haveandholdpp.

    —  S! Let us go. Make a noise. Slee . . .

    —  Qui . . . The gir . . .

    —  Huesofrichunfoldingmorn. Wakenupriseandprove. Pro-

videforsacrifice.

    —  Wait! Hist! Let us list!

    For our netherworld's bosomfoes are working tooth and nail

overtime: in earthveins, toadcavites, chessganglions, saltkles-

 

 

---

 

572

 

ters, underfed: nagging firenibblers knockling aterman up out of

his hinterclutch. Tomb be their tools! When the youngdammers

will be soon heartpocking on their betters' doornoggers: and the

youngfries will be backfrisking diamondcuts over their lyingin

underlayers, spick and spat trowelling a gravetrench for their

fourinhand forebears. Vote for your club!

    —  Wait!

    —  What!

    —  Her door!

    —  Ope?

    —  See!

    —  What?

    —  Careful.

    —  Who?

    Live well! Iniivdluaritzas! Tone!

    Cant ear! Her dorters ofe? Whofe? Her eskmeno daughters

hope? Whope? Ellme, elmme, elskmestoon! Soon!

    Let us consider.

    The procurator Interrogarius Mealterum presends us this pro-

poser.

    Honuphrius is a concupiscent exservicemajor who makes dis-

honest propositions to all. He is considered to have committed,

invoking droit d'oreiller, simple infidelities with Felicia, a virgin,

and to be practising for unnatural coits with Eugenius and Jere-

mias, two or three philadelphians. Honophrius, Felicia, Eugenius

and Jeremias are consanguineous to the lowest degree. Anita

the wife of Honophrius, has been told by her tirewoman, For-

tissa, that Honuphrius has blasphemously confessed under volun-

tary chastisement that he has instructed his slave, Mauritius, to

urge Magravius, a commercial, emulous of Honuphrius, to solicit

the chastity of Anita. Anita is informed by some illegitimate

children of Fortissa with Mauritius (the supposition is Ware's)

that Gillia, the schismatical wife of Magravius, is visited clandes-

tinely by Barnabas, the advocate of Honuphrius, an immoral

person who has been corrupted by Jeremias. Gillia, (a cooler

blend, D'Alton insists) ex equo with Poppea, Arancita, Clara,

 

 

---

 

573

 

Marinuzza, Indra and Iodina, has been tenderly debauched

(in Halliday's view), by Honuphrius, and Magravius knows

from spies that Anita has formerly committed double sacrilege

with Michael, vulgo Cerularius, a perpetual curate, who wishes

to seduce Eugenius. Magravius threatens to have Anita molested

by Sulla, an orthodox savage (and leader of a band of twelve

mercenaries, the Sullivani), who desires to procure Felicia for

Gregorius, Leo, Vitellius and Macdugalius, four excavators, if

she will not yield to him and also deceive Honuphrius by ren-

dering conjugal duty when demanded. Anita who claims to have

discovered incestuous temptations from Jeremias and Eugenius

would yield to the lewdness of Honuphrius to appease the

savagery of Sulla and the mercernariness of the twelve Sullivani,

and (as Gilbert at first suggested), to save the virginity of

Felicia for Magravius when converted by Michael after the

death of Gillia, but she fears that, by allowing his marital rights

she may cause reprehensible conduct between Eugenius and

Jeremias. Michael, who has formerly debauched Anita, dispen-

ses her from yielding to Honuphrius who pretends publicly to

possess his conjunct in thirtynine several manners (turpiter!

affirm ex cathedris Gerontes Cambronses) for carnal hygiene

whenever he has rendered himself impotent to consummate by

subdolence. Anita is disturbed but Michael comminates that

he will reserve her case tomorrow for the ordinary Guglielmus

even if she should practise a pious fraud during affrication

which, from experience, she knows (according to Wadding),

to be leading to nullity. Fortissa, however, is encouraged by

Gregorius, Leo, Viteilius, and Magdugalius, reunitedly, to warn

Anita by describing the strong chastisements of Honuphrius

and the depravities (turpissimas!) of Canicula, the deceased wife